Clairvaux Manifesto, pp. 187-189.

(quote) It has to start with Jesus. It has to respond to Jesus. God will provide. Things are changing in how all this is done. I want to be part of the new, fresh way. I don't know the way, exactly. I just think we're a bit too comfortable with our models, so I'm just calling this stuff out. There is stuff that we assume in our half a century of "fund- raising orthodoxy" that sends the wrong message-- and yes, the medium is the message. Whatever happened to honestly believing that we lack nothing? We can still do big things. If God is in it, people will give without even being asked. There is a hairpin trigger here. When Joseph interpreted Pharaoh's dreams and suggested what might be done, he was put in charge of building barns, and they had to be built by the time of the first harvest-- and the next one, and the next one, and the next one, and the next one, and the next one, and that last one.

This isn't about building a warehouse and figuring out how to fill it and distribute the product within. This is about being dropped into a combat zone and assessing strategy and tactics while dodging shrapnel based on the available resources, strength, experience of local personnel, and mounting casualty rates. This is about a circle of friends strengthening the front lines and pushing forward into the gates of hell. We are not defending a Lego castle with plastic swords. Don't impose limitations on yourself. The weapons and medication entrusted to you are eternal things.

dark night of the soul

small naked curled up ball of fear

numbing darkness joints marrow

tears blur stinging

agony

slipping through the cracks

the cry, "Lord, save me!"

light glint swinging rapier

balm 

stable heartbeat

breathe

(end quote)